Randomness Overload~

Too many mistakes in a short span of time can make us feel miserable about our beautiful life. But doesn’t that mean we actually forgot those beautiful moments in our life in the same period of time?

The best years in my life were since 2004 till 2008. Right after I stepped out of my school with my SPM results in my hand back in March 2009, I felt an urge to return to this school and continue my studies. That is why probably I chose Form Six as an option. After almost a year, I deeply regret my decision. Maybe Form Six is way too much for me or simply, I slacked off a lot. And it is a shame that all these realizations hit me after I ended my friendship with my bestie. Like usual, she guided me indirectly. Nowadays, I tried my best to study and work on subjects I’m weak such as Mathematics and Chemistry. All I’m hoping for is to pass all four papers to show that I’m not stupid. Full stop.

I’m not a studious girl. I spent most of my high school years by goofing around and still managed to secure second top student in the class. And I still believe that was possible because my teachers rocks in the class and I’m the type of person who depends on classroom lessons. There are few Form Six teachers that I wish to teach me in these 1 ½ year. Sir Lim just rocks when it comes to Mathematics. Although I barely passed my Additional Mathematics when he taught me back in Form 5, his lessons were understand-able by me. But now, I can’t even understand what is on the white board and Math-ing in home is just as hard. Sir Iskandar knows what his job. He entered the class, scribbled various equations in coloured marker pens and explains in detail. His English is good and I can understand what he’s trying to tell us. Now, the readers might already know what my current Chemistry teacher’s problem is. Biology lessons are sleep-causing but recently with God’s grace, I found it way more interesting than Mathematics. General Studies or rather known as Pengajian Am is uncomment-able lesson. What I should expect to learn from a teacher who is tired to climb only 4 flights of stairs and sulks at our actions? Fine. As a teacher, she should be able to control the class instead of complaining that huge number of students in the class in the reason of her mood swing. Also, she really should stop expecting us to answer exactly what is on her mind. After all circumstances, I will believe that God had shed some miracle over me if I pass all four papers. For a person like me, it’s really hard when classroom turned into hell. Nonetheless, I love every single teacher in my school.

If school has not give me enough trouble to deal with, my aunt adds up to it. Why everyone love to see Nanthini suffer? Why on earth watching Tamil show doesn’t bring any harm to my studies but watching a Korean show does? I just can’t understand the way she thinks. All she expects from me now is stay away from television and study my ass off for just another 2 months. Wouldn’t I die if I keep staring at books with no relaxation? But I did sacrifice a few Korean shows just for her.

Deepavali and my birthday is just less than a month away. And along the course is my so-called graduation under the name of Farewell Party for Form Five and Six students on 30th October. I still believe that there is a hidden wonder behind my birthday falling on Deepavali and STPM starts on 23rd November (2+3=5 is my lucky number ^_^) Hope everything goes just the way I hope.

P/S: Do you believe in Karma? Because I do believe it now. Seeing those individuals that hurt me is now suffering for certain reasons. You can call me devil for finding happiness in other’s pain but hey, even my Biology teacher said that not all of us are 100% saint.

Dilemma for a STPM student who wants to be a full-time fangirl for a day~

Mind is filled with various plans for JYJ New Album Showcase Tour 2010 Live In Malaysia. I need to have at least RM500 for the ticket and expenses. Adding to that, I still have to convince my parents and plan my journey to the capital city.

Reasons for why I SHOULD NOT go

- I have important exam in November and have lots of revision to be done in such a short time.

- My parents (especially my dad) feel that this addiction will distract me from my studies.

- The very next day (October 17th), there is a prayer for my grandfather and MOST of my relatives will be here,in Kampar -.-;;

- I have to travel alone all the way from Kampar to Midvalley Convention Center which I'm a bit afraid to do so.

Reasons for why I DESPERATELY wants to go

- It's Jaejoong,Yoochun and Junsu that we are expecting to see! Although I wish the other two will be here as well.

- JYJ's (Jaejoong,Yoochun,Junsu) activities are halted in Japan so there's a high possibility that they won't be able to make it on December or anytime later than now.

- Wanna experience the fangirling with thousands of my 'species'~ LOL

For those who is not aware of this event of the year, check out sponsor,RedStar's blog for more information.

Dear Ambition

Going to change my blogging style. Shall start a post with a question and answers it based on my personal opinion. My followers can share their views as well.

Question : What inspires your ambition and how far can you go to achieve it?

Ambition is vital in order to be on the right track in your life. Some people like to plan everything in their life and some being completely vice versa by living the life as it is. I like to plan most of the things in my life such a reunion gathering or future plans. I’m not the one you expect to say “Let’s see how my results turn out to decide my future study plan.” Instead, I would tell them you that I wanna be a Forensic Scientist specialized in homicide field. Most people wowed at my answer and some of them might even think whether I have what it takes to be one.

Ever heard of famous American crime-solving TV series, Crime Scene Investigation or known as CSI? That’s what triggers my passion to study Forensic Science. When I was in elementary school, I used to read the famous Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew series of detection novels. I watched my first ever CSI episode when I was 14. Detection based series or novels or even comics like Detective Conan are just what I need to spend my time. Between detective and criminologist, I always have this feeling that detectives live a secret life and earn money only when someone assigns them for solving cases. So that’s what inspires my ambition.

After sat for PMR back in 2006, I browsed the Internet to find more relevant information regarding forensic science and once I came across an article that says good knowledge in Chemistry is essential for it. I was very diligent back then till I actually studied first few chapters in Form 4 Chemistry textbook. I kept telling myself that I need to master Chemistry in order to achieve my dream of being a forensic scientist. I was more disappointed for scrapping a B3 in Chemistry rather than my ‘almost-fail’ Additional Mathematics. But Chemistry in Form 6 was way harder than I ever imagined it will be. There’s a huge difference between Form 5 and Form 6 syllabus and so far, I did a bad job in maintaining my progress in that subject. Dear Chemistry, do you know that I love you so much? Just stay in my brain for a longer period lah! For me, public universities are the safest and cheapest way to do your postgraduate courses compared to the private ones. I had seen a few friends of me who are studying in private colleges with big financial problems. So in Malaysia, University Sains Malaysia (USM) offers the postgraduate for Forensic Science course and I believe it would be great to study in USM with all the great facilities offered by them. Two days ago, I looked up for Forensic Science course requirement (again!) in USM. It is stated that I need a minimum of 3.00 GPA overall. And I have the confident that I can score it if I put enough effort in my studies. What I want is the feeling of accomplishment that I had worked every possible way to achieve my ambition rather than give up without trying at least once. To me, it is planning your own failure. So what if I don’t make it as I wanted it to be? I will be happy enough to choose another career prospect that allows me make a great deal of money.

Rambling

Listening to TVXQ’s , I’m thinking what should I scribble about this time. My blog deserves sympathy for its poor maintenance. I’m not good with words to describe my feelings so I don’t choose blogging as the best idea for me to vent out my current problems. I’m on 2 weeks holidays and the first week was spent by going to temple in my neighbourhood as there’s the annual festival that went on for 10 consecutive days. After a certain incident back in 2008, I had lost my faith in God therefore I did not do much praying last 2 years. But something struck me recently. If God was being unfair to me, then He is nothing compared to my certain friend. I did not change to 24/7 religious girl yet. But I believe I’m still doing the right thing. Respect the God just as you respect your parents. Enough said.

TVXQ, I miss them so much. Again, there’s no exact word to describe how much I miss them at the moment but still it’s the only phrase I can come up with. They are going through so much hardships and seeing some people commentating on their looks and styles but not their talent and attitude is a sad thing. I can only smile at their weird way of describing pretty looking boys. Is there any rule that says males can’t be pretty? If being pretty for a guy is called gay, then an ugly girl should be called transsexuals? Mind you, not all girls are pretty. Beauty is a gift from the God and that applies to both genders. I prefer what’s beneath the skin rather than flawless of a person. And TVXQ is just lucky to have both looks and talents. Enough said.

I have to mention TVXQ again. Simply because they means a lot to me. You might be wondering 1) How an Indian girl can be so addicted to Korean boys that she never met before nor understands their language? 2) What is about this DongBang boys that can make her thinks about them all the time? It is simple. TVXQ just rocks. They sing and dance well. They have good manners and attitude. And not to forget their great humour sense. They appear so pure and genuine to me until their sad faces can make me cry. Thanks to them, I’m crying more nowadays. It takes time to understand the great feeling of being a Cassiopeia (TVXQ’s fans). Have to admit that a minority out of the world’s largest fanbase of an artist can be really crazy and absurd sometimes but overall Cassiopeia just rocks. And wanna know the power of TVXQ? Just count their fans. Korean fans (Cassiopeias) are nearly 800,000 and that does not even count the unregistered fans, Japanese fans (Bigeasts) and International fans like me. I’m proud to be a fan of theirs because they are awesome ^^ Enough said.


By the way, JaejoongYoochunJunsu version of SungKyunKwan Scandal's OST. Finally the full version is released after so much of chaos. Hearing the three of them singing in their mother tongue after being in J-pop for so long is great ^^

Happiness comes in many ways

I must admit that I'm not a blog person. But somehow I had the urge to scribble something about my 2 weeks school holidays.

1. Never touch your books in holidays.
Holidays are the days that you ought to spend by playing random computer games,listening to songs,watching movies or simply relaxing by chatting with your siblings. Most parents have the "my child is not studying for her exam" thought when we avoid the books and I'm saying this based on my own experience. I was tired both mentally and physically after fought myself for Orientation week for Lower 6, Teacher's Day celebration and EXAMS!!! All I was looking forward for is the 2 weeks holidays and my dad nagged about me not studying =.=ll

2. Fun...Fun....And More Fun...
When you are in your late teens, you have to try a few things without getting your parents involved. And I did something with my friends~ We planned to bake pizzas in my house and went for shopping in Tesco. Even had a great time of splashing water at each other in Batu Berangkai falls. For me,these experiences were terrific! Because I always spend my time with my family or alone in the house. To be with a few of your close friends and do shopping is damn nice~ We were looking at things and said "Look! my mum cooks curry using this. what this is called in Chinese huh?" LOL....I do feel bad for the only boy (Mok Kwan Hoe) to be with us in Tesco. Pizza turned out to be err...half disaster and half delicious. But that experience is knowledge,right?

3. Family
Some people don't prefer to stay at home. Maybe thinks it's boring. especially when all you have to do is studying =.=ll I love chatting with my sisters and brother-in-law. That's why I had a great time in Puchong. (where my married sister is now living) My 4 year old niece takes a 'good' care of me XP she never leave my side even when she goes to bed. ^_^ i told my sister about the pizza and she made one for me. this time it was wayyyyyy better than what i did =.=ll

(to be continued...)