Denial...I'm keep living in denial...

I really hate to say this but the title really explains how am I actually living on this face of Earth. I'M LIVING IN COMPLETE DENIAL. So what brought me to this realization?? Hmm..the story goes like this.

Yes, it's about Jae'l Break..

For those who don't what is Jae'l Break, it's a game organized by Shades of Jae'd:The International Forum for Kim Jaejoong which is basically hunt for the lost Jaejoong by answering the questions in different DBSK online community...Ever since I knew about the game, i was excited..i love any riddle-related games..so pre-registered and waited anxiously for 1st March..

The first version of the game begun on 1st March and we were going in a smooth but hectic in someways path..so the Jae'l Break crew decided to restart the game with a more organized gameplay..and they came up with a 4 round of Jae'l break...Basically, you need to answer 7 DBSK-related questions by MAILING the answers to the guards (those who checks the answers)...

1st and 2nd round was success...Before the 3rd round begin, they announced that they will accept the FIRST 45 players who made it to 4th round...and guess what, the game begin as usual in the midnight..so i ditched my books away and stay alert even an hour before 12am...but the clue was late and it wasn't late by few minutes but AN HOUR! i knew this is a bad sign to begin the round with coz some players already have the clue and they started playing the game before i do...once i received the clue, i did what i should and answered like 15 mins later..and the reply for my answer took 2 HOURS! I had waited until 3am for the reply only saying that my answers are wrong and by that time, there are some players who already at the 4th question..but i answered the first 2 questions and went to bed at 4.30am...

Checked back my inbox at 11am + and saw that my answer was wrong..so i resend it with the correct answer..and this time the reply was much more faster..so i moved on until 5th question, where i sent my answers and decided to take a bath since it's near 5 then...but before i sign out, i noticed an announcement on the site's homepage..."We have chose the 45 players who made it to the next round" i was devastated! completely!

dang! i don't why i cried when i saw '45 players had been chosen' on SoJ home..

I don't why i cry 'teresak-esak' like a kid every time i think about my failure to make it to round 3...

and i don't why, i get teary now as i type this message..

i thought i still stand a chance although the replies for my email were super late...
and finally, what i had dreaded for had happened...i know late replies in this game can affect the player's chance to win this game..you know what, i got the JJ clue at 1am, answered it right away and got my mail at 3am...imagine, i had waited 2hours just to not make it to 3rd round..

what was heartbreaking is that i was still waiting for the reply from 5th Hotspot when i saw the notice in SoJ...

i dun care i lose but Jae'l Break is different..I knew very well that i stand a chance to qualify to 4th round but circumstances made me fail...i just wanna make it to top 10 or even in the finals...i dunno whether it worth my tears or not..but i don't have control even over my tears at the moment...i saw Kyra (the forum's admin) was quite upset with a player's comment in Player's Feedback..i dunno wanna ruin the good term that i had with the admins and mods because i didn't make the cut..

anyway, thanks for listening to my rambling^^